Too little too late: Losing your star performers

They’re the most loyal employees you have. They’re your hardest workers. They understand both quality and quantity, producing the best results and the most results. They’re always willing to learn and teach. They represent your organization with pride. They’re coworkers love them; your customers love them; you love them. They’re your star performers.

But, why would you wait until they have one foot out the door to get them to stay? So many leaders and organizations make this very mistake all too often. Specifically, I see leaders and organizations overlook five specific areas.

1. Training and Development
This starts with hiring practices. It is a misconception that many recruiters and hiring managers have that just because you hire someone who is extremely qualified, it means that they will require less training and development. This is far from true. If anything, they might have different needs when it comes to the areas in which they need further development. Richard Branson says it best: “Train people well enough so they can leave, treat them well enough so they don’t want to.”

That’s what development is all about: growing our people, helping them improve their current skills and develop new ones. One of the most heartbreaking stories I heard was from an exceptional coworker about why she left a company. She said she begged the company to pay for her to take a class and they kept putting it off, year after year that she would ask. Finally, she saved enough money to pay for it herself. When she put in her notice, they asked her why she was leaving and she said, “On several occasions spanning several years, I gave this organization the opportunity to invest in me. I wasn’t asking to go back to school for a degree or to attend an outrageous number of conferences each year. I asked to have one class paid for so I could learn one new skill. The organization told me that it could not afford it. So, I invested in myself and now, I can’t afford to offer up my new skill to an organization that wasn’t willing to invest in me.”

2. Career Growth
Career growth can mean many things. It can mean simply investing in training and development of your staff. It can also mean providing new opportunities for people, whether it’s a lateral movement or upward movement within the organization.

Give people a chance especially if you already know their potential. Some organizations make it impossible for their employees to move up internally which is why they have high turnover and onboarding becomes the busiest process in the organization.

3. Meaningful Recognition
Problem? Yes. The problem here is that organizations assume that people like to be recognized the same way, which is not true. Some people enjoy being the center of attention while others prefer a more subtle form of recognition.

What does this mean for leaders? It means that leaders need to get to know their employees. It sounds like a daunting task but it’s worth the investment. If you customize and personalize your recognition programs and decisions, your staff will feel truly appreciated and special. If there’s only one or two generic ways of recognizing people, the recognition loses its meaning and value.

4. Playing Favorites
Misconception: rewarding your star performers equals playing favorites. This happens the most probably during performance review time. Managers give everyone the same rating because they don’t want to have tough conversations and because they don’t want staff to think they’re playing favorites.

High performers hate this! They feel like their time, hard work and results are for nothing when their lower performing peers are receiving the same review rating and/or raise and not expected to improve performance. If they’re not recognized for being better, they’ll either stop being a star performer or they’ll leave, neither of which are good for an organization.

5. Salary
While many believe this is the number one reason why people leave organizations, it is not. However, it still is important. The biggest mistake I see leaders make is throw money at their star performers as they’re heading out the door. If your employees have already accepted another job offer and are giving you two weeks notice, it’s probably not the most ideal time to offer them a raise. If you truly value them, you would have given them a fair raise a long time ago.

The most embarrassing thing about watching leaders do this is that they either look so desperate because they’re essentially begging the employee not to leave or they look silly because they actually believe it’s going to work. It usually doesn’t.

Attaining star performers is an opportunity. Retaining them is a privilege earned by grasping the opportunity to do everything in your power to provide them the best possible work environment in which to thrive. Lesson learned? Don’t fall into the trap of losing your best employees because you did too little too late.

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Accountability without support does not work

As an HR professional, I could not agree more that we need to hold employees accountable for their performance. In fact, I find that leaders don’t do this enough. However, the biggest problem I see leaders make when it comes to accountability, besides the fact that they don’t do it enough, is that they try to hold people accountable without ever providing the proper training or support.

If your team is not meeting expectations or you’re not meeting your numbers for the month, why not start by asking what you can do? Too many leaders look first to blame their staff – they’re not working hard enough, they’re not competent enough, they don’t care about their work enough. Well, sometimes, it might be because they have not received enough resources, guidance, technology or training.

Next time your team falls short, don’t look for blame but instead, look for areas where you can help. If you don’t know where the problem is or how to help them, ask. Ask for feedback from the staff. They usually know exactly where they need help and what would help them do their jobs better.

Leaders should take ownership in improving and developing their teams to be successful. Once you do that, then you can set clear expectations and hold people accountable. Only when you have done everything in your power to make your team successful can you realistically hold them accountable for performance.

Invest the time in your people and it’ll pay off. Not only will you develop a strong team that way but you’ll boost morale. People will want to work for you and do their best every day because you invested in them and believe in them.

Once you’ve done everything to make your team successful, you can hold them accountable. As a leader, you have the power to give employees encouragement, tools/resources and independence to do their work, make decisions and succeed. If you don’t give people the tools to do their job effectively/efficiently, you can’t expect fast/accurate results.


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Leadership fail: A “make everyone happy” attitude

Whether we are conscious of it or not, we often want to make everyone happy. As leaders, we don’t take pride in firing people, writing people up, not taking people’s ideas or leaving people out of important decisions but the truth is that we may very well have to do these things sometimes.

One of the greatest leadership fails I’ve seen is avoiding difficult decisions, crucial conversations and other unpopular but necessary actions. I’ve seen leaders let their employees get away with some of the worst behaviors because they think that talking to the employees about their behaviors will make things worse and the employees won’t like them anymore. First of all, this is a poor excuse for not addressing people problems. Secondly, the reality is often different from the leaders’ perceptions.

A leader with a “Make Everyone Happy” attitude can be extremely detrimental to a team. We’ve all seen them. They’re the ones who ask everyone in the organization for their opinion before making a decision and values every person’s opinion the same. They’re the ones who give poor performers a good review because they don’t want to have “that” conversation. They’re the ones who try to reward everyone, even people who aren’t doing their job well…or at all.

In hindsight, these leaders are actually hurting themselves and their teams. A “Make Everyone Happy” attitude can:

  • Slow productivity. When we try to make everyone happy by including them in every decision, we never get a decision made or we end up making a decision without everyone because we need to meet a deadline – and then, they get even more upset with us because we asked for their opinion and didn’t wait for them to give it. Sometimes, involving too many people in a decision, assignment or project can hinder productivity. Leaders must know when to include everyone and when not too.
  • Devalue high performers. If we treat our poor performers the same as our high performers, our high performers will start to notice. I see leaders do this a lot when it comes to performance reviews. Whether we like it or not, employees talk. Our high performers will find out if you rate a poor performer similar to them and they will become less motivated to do a good job. Why should they go above and beyond if we don’t recognize them for it?
  • Ruin a leader’s reputation. Employees will stop trusting us if we are always trying to make everyone happy. They will notice. Trust will be broken. Leaders must focus on doing the right things the right way, which may not always be the most popular thing that makes everyone happy.

Trying to make everyone happy can often backfire on leaders and do the opposite – piss everyone off. Great leaders aren’t afraid to stand alone, which is why they rarely have to.


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Listening isn’t good enough, great leaders act

There’s been quite a buzz recently about listening skills. Many books, presentations and posts/articles have surfaced that talk about how listening is the newly found or hidden skill of leadership. The authors talk about how so many leaders lack this skill. While I think listening is very critical to leadership, I certainly do not believe it is a skill that people lack. In fact, I think many people are good listeners. The skill that many leaders lack is the ability to act on what they hear.

When it comes to being an effective leader, listening isn’t enough. It’s only a good skill to have if you know how to use it. You’ll never gain the trust or respect of your employees unless you act on what you hear. It’s great that you care and that you don’t talk over people but if all you do is listen and then let the conversation drift into the past without any action, employees will stop coming to you.

I had a manager once who was a fantastic listener. When I started, he was so kind and approachable. He never turned me away when I needed to talk about something, express my concerns about a project or just vent. His listening skills gave me a great first impression. That impression didn’t last long though.

I would express concerns about unethical practices and major performance issues. He always encouraged me to continue reporting my concerns and always welcomed me to go into his office to talk about them. However, after about the third time I had to go to him for the same concern because nothing was being done about it, I realized that he was still listening but that he did not know how to act on what he heard. He always had an excuse as to why I was not seeing results.

Here are some common themes employees hear repeatedly from bosses who are great at listening but terrible at addressing what they hear:

  • Playing the “I wasn’t aware” card: “Oh, nothing changed? I didn’t know nothing changed. Thanks for telling me.” Years later, nothing changes.
  • Playing the memory card: “I don’t remember us talking about that but I’m glad you’re telling me now.” Years later, nothing changes.
  • Playing the “oops” card: “Oh my, I’m so sorry. I completely forgot to follow-up on that. Thanks for reminding me.” Years later, nothing changes.
  • Playing the “let’s see how things go” card: “I didn’t forget about our conversation. I just want to give it some time and see how things go. I really think they’ll get better.” Nope, the magic trick didn’t work…years later, nothing changes.

So, my boss was a good listener, but it wasn’t enough. It didn’t stop the inappropriate behavior. It didn’t stop the hostile work environment. It didn’t help build teamwork. It didn’t make us work more productively. It didn’t instill confidence or trust.

Eventually, I lost almost complete trust in my manager. I felt defeated, discouraged and disengaged. I never went to him again with a concern, a problem or even an idea.

I vowed never to make assumptions like that when I became a leader. Just like silence doesn’t mean an employee no longer has concerns, listening skills doesn’t mean someone is a good leader. To be effective as leaders, we need to take what we hear and see (yes, nonverbal cues too) from our employees and act on those things. We need to address their concerns even if we conclude that they are not found. We need to provide answers to their questions even if that means the answer is “I don’t know but I’ll find out.” We need to address their behaviors and their performance even if that means having a difficult conversation.

It’s a terrible thing to listen to someone but not hear what they are saying.

Effective leaders act and get results.


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Ditch the screen, pick up an improv class (Part 3 of 3)

I was at the SHRM conference earlier this year and attended a session about how a company out east requires all of its employees to take an improv course. In fact, it’s part of the orientation process for new hires. I was fascinated by the idea and got to thinking about comedy, improv and leadership.

Instead of spending Friday nights checking out the latest movie flicks at the theater or on Netflix from your couch, sign up for an improv class. It’ll not only be more entertaining, but it might just make you a better leader.

Improv comes from the word improvise or improvisation, which is something exceptional leaders do well. Taking an improv class will teach you more than just improvising but it will also allow you to bring a whole new kind of culture to your team or organization, one full of laughter, energy, and candor.

Do you ever have an employee say something to you that is so rude, unexpected or otherwise, shocking? You stare at them like a deer in headlights, not knowing how to respond. Well, improv will teach you how to be more comfortable with yourself so that you become more comfortable with others.

This is a lesson that I have learned over and over again and still continue to learn. Improv has helped me develop the tact, the wit and the self-confidence to overcome situations that would normally make me feel extremely uncomfortable.

How is that possible, you ask? It’s not just about laughing and fun. Improv classes push us out of our comfort zones. It forces us to respond in the moment to unexpected scenarios and comments in front of an audience of peers and strangers.

Improv is the future of leadership development and communication skills training. We now have five generations in the workforce. Are you and your organization’s leaders ready to respond to all of them, build a culture for all of them and engage all of them into your work and organization? Consider using improv training to help prepare your organizations for the future.


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Ditch the television, pick up a book (Part 1 of 3)

Good leaders don’t just keep up with best practices in their areas of expertise, but they keep up with best practices in leadership. Either way, it means that they are reading up on what other professionals are saying, what researchers are finding, and what the media is reporting.

If you’re reading this post, you’ve made progress of your own. You’re reading this because my post or the subject of my blog interested you because you have some commitment to being a good leader. Maybe you manage people, maybe you started your own business or maybe you are that team member who acts as an informal leader, even to those you work for.

Whether it’s a book, a magazine, the newspaper or your favorite blog, reading enhances the way we think. It allows us to think differently because we are reading about other people’s perspectives or about new ideas.

Reading also makes us more knowledgeable so we can engage in meaningful conversations, better network with other professionals and bring fresh ideas to our work. It’s amazing how reading can open up our minds without us even realizing it.

What’s on your reading list?


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My first leadership lesson, courtesy of my mother

As I started this blog, I got to thinking: what do I really know about leadership? What does anyone really know about leadership?

It’s one of those concepts that is constantly changing. If anything, leadership is not static. It’s always evolving.

My mother was raised in a culture where being an elder was the definition of being a leader. The older you were, the more respect you received. It did not matter if my mother never agreed with my grandma; she did anything and everything grandma told her to do.

Yes, based on that definition, my mother should think I’m the most disrespectful person ever. She doesn’t though. My mother has come to understand that leadership is different depending on where you go because it differs from culture to culture, from generation to generation, and from organization to organization.

So, even though in my mother’s culture a formal leader was defined as someone who was older, the best leaders still had common characteristics. Think of it as a manager versus a real leader in an organization. There are plenty of managers who don’t know how to lead their people.

As we continue to explore the difference between a manager and a leader, keep in mind that the definition of an exceptional leader is going to change throughout time or across cultures, and the best of the best are the ones who know how to adapt.

So, there’s our first lesson: good leaders know how to adapt to change.


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